helping seniors live well in later life

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Tag: Decluttering

  • Letting things go

    Letting things go

    Some people find the act of decluttering simple, and some find it very difficult.  It can be a bit like baring your soul to a counsellor – difficult at first, but rewarding as you spend more time doing it, and something that will open you up to new possibilities at home and in your life as you let go of your ‘stuff’. 

    When we are decluttering with clients, we find that we are operating in a similar role to that of a counsellor.  We hear  so much about clients’ memories, both good and bad, and about their families and their families’ experiences.  It can really help to talk about these things to help process memories and allow items to be given away and rehomed.    Memories can be fun, or they can be a reminder of painful times, and sometimes talking about those difficult memories are the most important in helping you let go of items. 

    If the idea of talking to someone about your life or getting them to help you in your home seems tricky, then one easy way to start decluttering, is to implement the ‘one in one out’ policy.  If you buy a book, give away a book you already own. If you buy a new dress, give away a dress you own.  If someone gives you a candle, give away (or quickly use!) a candle.  If they give you a mug, give away a mug.   People don’t know that you’ve given away something they gave you.  If it gave you pleasure when you received it, it’s done its work and you can let it give someone else pleasure now. 

    To help other people minimise their clutter, when you give presents, give people experiences (theatre, a meal out, a cinema ticket) or things that are consumable (food, drink, flowers).  There are many subscriptions you can get for  consumable gifts. 

    If you need help to make a start, either by having a declutter plan or having someone be with you, do get in touch and we can book in an exploratory call.

  • Transitioning to domiciliary care

    Transitioning to domiciliary care

    If you are looking at getting help from a domiciliary carer for your loved one, there are some practical things to think about once you know you will be using their service: 

    1. Declutter the rooms they will need to be in.  This is important because your loved one’s home is the carer’s work place and it needs to be safe for them too.  Extra equipment in the home may well be needed so there should be space for this, and for the carer and your loved one to be able to move around as a pair.
    2. Ensure all of your loved one’s post, filing and general paperwork are up to date.   Then, when new items arrive,  they will be easy to fileand keep on top of.  If everything is already out of order, it takes  longer to deal with and to find things when you need them.
    3. Write simple instructions for the washing machine and how / when your loved one wants clothes and bedding washed.  Not everyone is the same, so these things vary.
    4. Write simple instructions for what to throw away from the fridge.  We  know that sometimes things are discarded too soon, and other times left for too long, so it can be good to have instructions. 
    5. Write instructions on how your loved one likes tea / coffee / certain meals – the carers  may not always be the same ones due to holiday or sickness, so although most agencies will try to send the same person, this helps towards a seamless handover.
    6. Write instructions for the dishwasher.  Not everyone has one or knows how to use it. They could wash up instead so you can suggest that if you think it’s easier.
    7. Let the carers know what day the bin collection is and what things can be recycled or not.  This varies from borough to borough, and can differ in blocks of flats, so this information makes it easier for everyone. 
    8. Let the carers know if they should answer the phone or not, and what you would like them to say if  your loved one cannot speak (either indisposed or doesn’t have capacity). 
    9. Make a note if there’s anything else you would like them to do.  It could be to charge the iPad once a week, or to make sure certain lights are left on.  They won’t know if you don’t tell them.
    10. Make sure you have enough toiletries for your loved one, or set up deliveries so they can’t run out.

    Hopefully the above practical suggestions will help the transition go smoothly.

  • What if the charity shop doesn’t want your unwanted items?

    What if the charity shop doesn’t want your unwanted items?

    When decluttering, which you might be doing as a new year’s resolution, we recommend that clients give unwanted items to charity (if they can’t easily be sold).  Doing so:

    1. Helps someone buy the item cheaper than they would new
    2. Helps the charity get money to support the cause/s they were set up for
    3. Helps create space in your home more quickly (if you want to sell something it hangs around for a long while before you list it and then someone comes to buy it!)

    But not everything can be given to charity.   For instance, cuddly toys need a CE label (making sure they meet certain standards); not all charities take electrical goods; some things aren’t good enough quality (stop and think – would you buy it?!); and they can’t sell knives or alcohol.

    What do we do with the things that can’t be taken to a charity shop?  Here are some ideas:

    • Unopened alcohol – we donate for prizes for fairs either to charities or school PTAs
    • Knives – any place that makes food for charity would welcome good quality knives, so you can ask around and give to them
    • Unopened food with 3 months on the label can go to the local food bank
    • Unopened food which is less than 3 months on the label or out of date but not perishable can be listed somewhere like ‘Olio’.    You can give freezer food away this way too.    Opened food can also be listed but obviously you need to state this. 
    • Towels can be listed online as free items (Facebook, Olio or Freecycle are examples of places you can list things free)  as dog walkers often want them.    You can also list duvets and pillows there too (of course if they’re in exceptional condition, the charity shops may take them).
    • Furniture is often rejected by charity collection services and can be given away online as free items.  
    • Old saucepans may have life left but not be good enough for charity so you can list them. 
    • Cosmetics: new items in box sets can be given to charity shops, but smaller items can go to https://thehygienebank.com/ and https://www.toiletriesamnesty.org/directory/ 
    • Stationery, crafting supplies etc can be given away on Olio or you might have a community group nearby who will take these things https://www.workandplayscrapstore.org.uk/

    There are many more categories, but if in doubt, call your local charity shop first and if it is not suitable list it as a freebie on a local Facebook Group and try and give it a new home!

  • New Year’s Resolutions

    New Year’s Resolutions

    Happy new year!  A time of new year’s resolutions for lots of people.   These are good in many ways as it is like setting goals – things you want to achieve or things to make you feel better.  Last year my new year’s resolution was always to eat dinner at the dinner table.  I think that lasted until September, so I did well as only 8% of new year’s resolutions are kept until the end of the year. I will try harder this year!  I also set a goal of hitting 5 million steps across the year (by doing approximately 14,000 steps per day).  I will let you know if I did this in the comments on Instagram and Facebook!

    As 80% of resolutions are already broken by the end of February you need to really want to make your resolution stick and form a new habit.

    One of the best ways of making your resolution stick is to do something called habit stacking – where you put the new thing onto something else you already do, which makes it easier to stick to.   We recommend James Clear’s Habit Stacking (available online or at all good bookshops!) which talks about this.   Examples of this could be wanting to lose weight and cleaning your teeth directly after dinner (making you less likely to eat more), or wanting to get more steps in, so walking round the block when you get out of your car at home before you go in.   You could also use a delayed gratification method and tell yourself you can’t have your coffee until you’ve done 20 minutes of walking.

    Another way of making new habits stick is to get an accountability buddy.  This works for walking, going to the gym etc.  We have also found that for many neurodiverse people, mirroring is a good way to get things done.  So if you continually put off your emails, or going to the dentist, agree to do your emails in the same room as a friend, or book an appointment for the dentist at the same time as someone else you know.

    If your new year’s resolution is to get tidy and declutter, but you haven’t started by February, let us know and we’ll come and help you!   And if your resolution is something else, let us know what it is! 

  • Get that ‘back to school’ vibe

    Get that ‘back to school’ vibe

    September is a time for new beginnings, just like January, as it has the back-to-school vibe that is inescapable even if you don’t have children or grandchildren in the education system.   It’s a time to start on things you have been putting off and generally just get going on your own home projects.

    So, if you would like to start decluttering, now is a good time!  If you are looking at it and wondering where to start then we recommend the following:

    1. Start small, one cupboard or corner at a time
    2. Schedule the decluttering into your diary
    3. Put on a rousing music track to keep you moving and stop you getting distracted
    4. Do it with a friend (you can help each other) or tell a friend you are doing it, to remain accountable
    5. Always remove items from your home for the waste or charity when you’re done, so you can see the results quickly.

     If you’d like a bespoke declutter plan, or you need some professional help, get in touch with us, we can help.   

  • Dealing with your loved one’s possessions after death

    Dealing with your loved one’s possessions after death

    When someone passes away it can be a very traumatic time for family and friends, even if the death was expected, and dealing with a loved one’s possessions can be a very emotional task.   Once any items in the will have been distributed, you can ask other family and friends if there is anything they want.  If there are more valuable items in the property they may fall into the estate to be valued, and so it is important that you follow the solicitors’ instructions for disposing of or sharing out those items.  Once that is done you may still be able to sell items, and so we recommend contacting auction houses and / or antique dealers who you know and trust, to help get you the best price.  After that we recommend looking at things in the following order:

    • Other furniture to sell, either on Ebay, Gumtree or through Facebook groups or marketplace
    • Furniture to give to charity or give away.  If a charity won’t take items you may be able to give them away using Olio, Gumtree or again, local Facebook groups or marketplace
    • Small items are best to go straight to charity, but not all shops take everything so check individually
    • Specialist items from hobbies may be of value to a collector even if they have no monetary value, so you might find someone online
    • Keep papers aside to be shredded if not needed for the legal process.  Get a shredding company to collect, or you can drop off
    • Use a waste collector or skip at the end.

    Or, if you want to save time, you can engage a house clearance firm to do all of the above for you.

  • Top tips for WhatsApp as you get older

    Top tips for WhatsApp as you get older

    If after last week’s blog you decided to get WhatsApp, you might need some lessons in how to use it.  We have some tips for you to make it easier.

    • If someone sends you a message that you want to find again you can star it (by tapping and holding the message and then selecting ‘star’).  And then in the chat for that person you can click on the three dots at the top of the screen and go to view contact where you’ll find the starred messages.
    • Sometimes you know someone sent you a link and you can’t find it so you can repeat the above with the three dots and go to media, links and docs and see all the photos and videos (media), docs (other attachments like pdfs or word docs etc) or links (websites) from there.  Much less to scroll through!
    • You can actually use WhatsApp on your computer.  You have to link the two together from the WhatsApp app on your phone by going to the home screen on the app and clicking on the three dots again, and then going to linked devices and press link a device.  Then follow the instructions.

    If all of that sounds a bit technical, we promise it isn’t once you’ve got used to it.  Ask a teenager to help, or give us a call!

  • Why might you want to move in later life?

    Why might you want to move in later life?

    We help many different types of people move home, not just older people. Most of our older people are downsizing because they recognise their home is the wrong size or type for them and their lifestyle. But we do get older people who move to a different area and they don’t always downsize when they do that. Just because you are older doesn’t mean you have to downsize when you move. You can take everything with you to another home the same size but in a different location, or one that is laid out in a different way.

    So what are the reasons to move area later in life?

    ·       To see more of your children and grandchildren

    ·       To get help from your children and grandchildren

    ·       To be less isolated, if you are currently living somewhere with poor infrastructure

    ·       To access medical treatment that isn’t available where you live

    ·       To live somewhere you have always wanted to live (e.g by the sea)

    ·       To be close to other family members

    ·       To be nearer a specific friend or hobby

    Whatever your reason for moving and whatever your age we can get you started on the journey!

  • Decluttering for Hoarders

    Decluttering for Hoarders

    Decluttering is difficult for anyone and it’s even harder for hoarders.  Hoarding is related to difficult experiences and feelings and it is not possible for a hoarder to ‘just get rid of things’.  

    Counselling is recommended before commencing any decluttering otherwise the anxiety and pain for the hoarder will be very high and it will be difficult to make any progress towards the end goal.  

    We have found that having a very specific reason to take a step to declutter and, in conjunction with counselling taking things very slowly, makes the end goal possible.    If a hoarder needs to move home and downsize due to the home being inaccessible or finances becoming difficult, then this is a good reason to start the process.  But it will need to be taken slowly.  We recommend that the counselling starts first but if that isn’t possible, then beginning with a small room for just an hour or two to understand the process can be beneficial too.  Often we have found that hoarders will take much of their belongings with them, but seeing it in a new home can have a positive effect in helping them to gradually part with things.

    Support can be found at:
     https://hoardinguk.org/support/services/

    https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/types-of-mental-health-problems/hoarding/helping-someone-who-hoards

  • How to file!

    How to file!

    This is a repost of our video from 2022, how to file!

    1. Keep your filing system simple – avoid using folders where you need to punch holes to file.
    2. Use different colours for different types of paperwork to help make it easy to find things.
    3. Do your filing either as you get it or save it all in one place and do it once a quarter or so.